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This dream is killing me..

24 July 2014

Go after your dreams. Others who tell you that you can't is only motivation and proof that they don't want you to get far in your life. You can always do what you set your mind to.

As photo above well said, I don't know if I should agree with that statement or not!
I let go my dream man because I matter about what others think of it. I feel really insecure of myself, in my mind I always think like this "who am I to begging for love". Just like that, I let it go my dream man even though deep down inside my heart I really want it but I don't want to be selfish for the whole of my life, so the good way is just let it go and life in the way other think. What a wrong decision in my life so far. I really don't know whether I can called that as one of my wrong decision in my life or the good decision ever I made in my life.
To moving on with that old matter, let's take a bright side " Its the good decision ever I made in my life to let go and move forward".
Being young is hard because we have a lot of choice how to live, who to live with and all that choices is have their own advantages and disadvantages. Bad news, it will impact of your life forever. Once you make a wrong choice, you'll cry and feel so regret with it but don't worry, always see on the bright side even though you in the darkness.
I really don't know why I am willing to live in what people think of me! I am so sick of that but I am not sure why? Maybe because of my culture? I love my culture so much but some of it really annoyed me sometime, seem like no freedom to pursue whatever you wanted. Your parent will totally disagree with you and most of the time, they are right or am I to weak to achieve the big dream?
 I don't want to live the same way forever and ever! I need to make myself different than others people that I ever know. I sound like crazy women or can I called that " who are you to dream that way?".
I don't care what people will called about me, I really don't care! I will live on my own world and make my family happy, that's all! 
I will keep do whatever I loved and feel happy about! What people think of me, I really don't care unless it can make me improve than should be okay. For whatever that make me wonder, this dream is killing me now? I will pretend that I never know that.
I wanted to be "SELFISH" when come to my big dreams! Its nothing for you but its really matter for me.
For dreamer out there, keep dreaming and work hard to make it come true!!

Ake',
Aya

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