Motherhood is lonely journey

06 December 2020

Hi there!
Thanks for click this link and read my motherhood experience.
No one ever told me how lonely this journey will be.
I remember the day my mum told me she wants to go back to Sarawak after just one month my pantang, she told me" I can't forever depends on her, I am a mother now", I cried silently every day, my mum sound so kejam right? but thats the reality, I need to be independent from now on. The moment my mum went back, I really feel so lonely and I finally feel the motherhood journey is so lonely. I have my husband but sometimes he doesn't understand what I really feel, he told me im think too much or whatever. Then, I started to just keep it myself.
I don't really have a friend that I can share my experience. I had few friends but sometimes I feel hesitate to talk because I know they also busy and trying their best to figure out their life.
I mostly google or read articles on motherhood apps.
For the support system, I have my husband that sometimes clueless, that's understandable because we both new this thing. I don't blame him for that.
My family? my siblings? Sometimes they support me but we can't connect most of the time because they at kampung. 
For church community, since I do not manage to connect with fellow mums due to pandemic, I joined the chat group but common sense I will never sharing my life there. I don't blame for this, I'm new so not really feel open to talk about motherhood journey.
In the positive side, in this lonely time, I just share what I really feel to God, only God understand me. Maybe that's why this journey like this because I really need to close to God.
I read Bible more and I have devotional plan everyday, thats why I feel a bit "stable", tanpa Tuhan, I think I will be crazy.

To new mother out there, if you feel lonely, you can reach me out, i am willing to be your motherhood friend.
You can whatsapp me,+60192872023(Aya)


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